Dear Frank,

WHERE ARE YOU? People have told me you are here with me, but you are distancing yourself so that I can move forward & not hang onto you... and us. :( I don't WANT that right now, and I am not ready for that. I have not yet properly mourned! I haven't seen you in my dreams nor have we spoken in them for many weeks now... so sad. I'm SO lonely without you. I thought after you were gone, maybe I would inherit your friends and family. I was wrong. Nobody calls (except your parents & sister). Nobody emails, or asks how I am doing on facebook. I feel unloved & forgotten... unimportant...

Anyways, after Babe's & your friends dropped the ball with the benefit planning, Fiona, my mom, Robyn, me & the kids picked it up... with less than two weeks before the big event. We pulled it off & I'd say it was a success. I met people who knew you & everyone loved you SO much. It was overwhelming for me, too. I wanted to be a wallflower & just watch how it went, but that didn't happen. As always, I felt like it was my own family who was there for me. I wish every family was like ours... maybe that's why we did more with my family? I think we both got something from them that we never could get anywhere else. For example, I sent a flyer to your grandma and asked that she forward the information onto your aunts & uncles, and your dad knew about it, too. NOBODY showed up except your dad. Your favorite grandpa's family was in St. Paul for a family reunion that same day/weekend, and none of them came by either. I can't understand it at all. Do they not care about your surviving children? They are family, too! I'll just never understand...

PLEASE come to see my & talk to me in my dreams again SOON. Or if you are here, show yourself somehow! I still love you like I did yesterday... and for so many years before. :(

Forever Yours,
~Lisa